Over this past week I have been struggling with (yet another) project that I have started. Normally my projects are completely self-contained, that is to say, I just do the whole thing and throw it out to a unsuspecting world and move on. But this latest effort required input from many people, most of whom I have never worked with before.
But it was not happening the way I envisioned. I thought that by just doing it, others would jump in, but for the most part they have not. I have been advised to start nagging the other folks, but nagging is not my nature. I don't like to be nagged, so I don't nag.
But even worse was this feeling I was doing things "right" and even "taoistically" and it still was not working. But I realize that I am wrong. I have not even been close to "right" or "taoistic."
I started the project ostensibly for the "right" reasons, but the real reason was to impress a potential employer. I wanted to make myself an instant "player" in the community. I was hoping that some rewards, however small would flow from my efforts. So I need to go back to the center.
Through his experience,
the sage becomes aware that all things change,
and that he who seems to lead,
might also, in another situation, follow.
So he does nothing; he neither leads nor follows.
That which he does is neither big nor small;
without intent, it is neither difficult,
nor done with ease.
His task completed, he then lets go of it;
seeking no credit, he cannot be discredited.
Thus, his teaching lasts for ever,
and he is held in high esteem.
I need to get back to having "no intent" to do the project because I enjoy the doing, being part of a group effort, getting to know my community better.